I come from a big family. My grandparents on my mom’s side had 5 daughters who gave them forty grandchildren (I can name them all, in case you’re wondering. Impressive, I know.) Those grandchildren have produced six bajillion great and great-great-grandchildren (I can only name the ones who live in Utah, Idaho, Wisconsin, Missouri, D.C. or were born prior to 1992.) Nine of the forty grandchildren were born to my mom and dad. Four brothers and four sisters are what I got. To date, my sibs have given me fourteen nieces and twelve nephews, who have given me three nephews-in-law, a niece-in-law and four gorgeous great-nephews (are you keeping up with this?) Let’s do the math…that’s roughly six bajillion seventy-eight people who I’m related to at least as closely as a first cousin twice removed…I think. And I only counted the cousins on my mom’s side! Oh, and I forgot to count my dad…and my uncles…and my brothers and sisters-in-law…Okay, the point is, I come from a big family. I like it a lot.
I used to be of the mindset that a big family was great because there were all these people who were obligated to love me no matter what. They were compelled to love me even if I was a jerk. That was kind of comforting because who doesn’t like to be loved? As I’ve matured, my thinking has changed somewhat. I’ve begun viewing familial love not so much as an obligation, but rather as a privilege. Here’s why: Those six bajillion seventy-eight plus people are really cool people! I haven’t met one of them that I thought was a total waste of space. Of course, I haven’t actually met ALL of them. I have a one week old great nephew that I have yet to lay eyes on, but I’m pretty certain that I’ll be quite impressed with him.
ALL my relations are wonderful. We have really good genes. Our grandparents were something else! I mean that in a good way. And our parents… wow! Mine were the best, but my aunts and uncles weren’t far behind! We’ve been brought up well. Not perfectly, but lovingly, as far as I know. So, since these people are so very cool, I feel privileged to have the opportunity to know them. If we didn’t share common grandparents, there’s really no way that I would know my Riddle and Beachley and McBride and Myers cousins. They would just be some random people living far away. What a tragic loss that would be!
These cousins are AMAZING! Each of them is different and unique and impressive in their fabulousness. If I could be in the same room with all of them at the same time, my head would explode with the sheer force of their awesomeness. I love my cousins. Some of them I know better than others. Some of them are my age, and I treasure the memories of summer visits with them as we grew up living states away, but still close in spirit. Others are older…much, much, much…just kidding…a little bit older. I’ve grown to love and respect them as contemporaries as I’ve grown up. Some are younger, but they’ve all caught up to me in the grown up boat and have proven themselves equal to their elders.
The feelings of love and respect and appreciation I feel for my cousins is dwarfed in comparison to the feelings of love and respect and admiration I feel for my siblings. My sisters and brothers hold a special place in my heart. I sometimes feel like our souls are linked a little bit, across the miles that separate us. Is that weird? I don’t think so.
Like my cousins, my siblings are diverse in many ways. We share parents (or in my cousins’ case, grandparents), but we are very different. Some of us are the same gender. Some of us have the same eye color. Some of us share religious beliefs. Some of us live within a day’s drive of Mom. Some of us voted for Obama. Some of us like tomatoes. Some of us are outgoing. Some of us are financially independent. Some of us have musical talent. Some of us have hidden struggles. And to each of these statements, some of us aren’t, don’t and didn’t. But it doesn’t matter at all. Not one little bit. No matter what the statement is or which side of the aren’ts, don’ts and didn’ts we’re on, my siblings and cousins (and parents, husband, children, nieces, nephews, aunts, uncles, inlaws…) will always have my unconditional love. Not because I have to love them, but because I choose to love them. I know, TODAY, that I am incredibly blessed to have the family I have. It was no accident. I’ll never take it for granted. I’ll never let our differences compel me to lose sight of what’s the same about us. We are in the same family. Family is important to me. My very, VERY big family.
Please share your thoughts about your family in the comments. And if you like what you've read at "The Brainy Broad" please become a follower and share this blog with your friends.
Hugs,
BB
I come from an enormous family as well. :) When I was young, I know I totally took my supersized family for granted. But as an adult, I realize how blessed I am. Despite the diversity in our family we have an unconditional understanding that we all belong. Belong to a group of people who lift one another up through difficult times and celebrate the good with enthusiasm. I have so many friends who have nothing to do with their family, some with good reason, but others because of hurt feelings or petty misunderstandings. Our family has had plenty of misunderstandings and more than plenty of hurt feelings. However, instead of letting it fester, we work things out. And often times we become even closer. I as well believe it is a choice. In our family, we CHOOSE to make our relationships what they are. I may not see my sisters, brothers, etc every day or every year for that matter, but I know that our bonds are stronge and that we share a deeep unconditional love. Thank you for your post you Brainy Broad you. :)
ReplyDelete